Love isn’t blind, maybe cockeyed!
Tips to building a long lasting, loving relationship
Hey everyone, I hope you all are having an amazing day! I just wanted to quickly come and chat with you and get your opinion on how do you feel when someone says LOVE is BLIND? I mean really, do you feel that people can be in a relationship and be completely oblivious to the fact that the relationship that they are in is poisonous to their mental, physical and emotional psyche?
I feel that people know when they are in a relationship that they have no business being in, but either because they are comfortable or afraid they decide to remain in that particular relationship because they may feel that they either don’t deserve better, can’t do better or that they perhaps they are the “better”. Okay I know what you are thinking, explain.
Okay so here it is short and to the point.
Don’t deserve better
The “Don’t deserve better,” : Before him/her I wasn’t doing much of anything and he /she took me as I am and helped be who I am today so I owe it to him/her to let this thing play out.
You have a past? Who doesn’t, no reason for you to feel like you can be treated any kind of way because of what you’ve done in your past. Everyone deserves to be happy despite the mistakes you may have made. You deserve to be respected and you deserve to be loved despite of what you’ve done. And if you find yourself in a situation where who you were and what you’ve done is the focus of your conversations, then know that this isn’t the right relationship for you and walk away because you deserve better.
Can’t do Better
The “ Can’t do Better” : He/She has a good paying job, we live a comfortable life, he/she helps me out when I need, so what if he/she mistreats me, beats me, emotionally abuses me every now and again. Who is to say I’ll find any better?
So many people are stuck in a rut in their relationships with the ideology that “I can’t do better” or “honey, this is as good as it gets.” Sometimes it’s because they are living a fairly comfortable life and has all the things they can want that money can buy but in turn they end up sacrificing the things that are most important in life, happiness, health, and their values. They are so into what people’s perceptions are of what their life is and behind closed doors they are miserable. They feel as though they can’t do any better in terms of finding someone that can be there for them financially and also treat them with goodness, kindness and respect. The truth of the matter is sometimes having a little less financially is worth a lot more than living miserably.
I am better
The “I am better” : I know I have it going on and he/she would be out of his/her mind to leave all of this. It doesn’t matter if I’m not completely and utterly in love with him/her as long as I know I got this.
There are people that get into relationships thinking that they’re doing someone a favor by being with them. Like so and so should be happy that I’m with them, because I could be with anyone else but I’m choosing to be with you.
Sometimes it isn’t even the words they say but by their actions. To add to this further, these people have not come to realize that their narcissism is truly keeping themselves from finding true happiness. The “I am better” settle to be in relationship where they can feel superior to their partner even if they aren’t completely and utterly in love with them simply because of their own insecurities. They are fearful of rejection, fearful of one discovering their flaws and truly seeing them for what they are which is someone wanting to be loved unconditionally.
You see some of us may fall into these categories and will be able to see ourselves in these examples or in similar situations and some of us may not even fit the bill, but one thing we all have in common is that we want to find LOVE, the one we can spend the rest of our lives with that will do their best to make us happy and us make them happy in return.
Sometimes we throw on our blinders and find excuses to stay in our unhealthy relationships even when we know how the story will end. We allow things to go too far, play out too long and by the time we get ready to walk away we are in way to deep and it becomes all the more difficult. So my challenge for anyone that knows they are in an unhappy, unhealthy, crappy relationship is to make a decision about finding happiness, contentment and above all LOVE.
Hope you enjoyed this article and as always feel free to comment below!